So begins Max Boyce’s legendary 1975 LP “We All Had Doctors’ Papers”, which remains the only comedy album to have topped the UK chart.
That opening was a nod to Boyce’s surroundings, with the album being a live recording of a show at Pontarddulais RFC.
It also touched on the age-old rivalry between the west Wales club and their near neighbours Hendy RFC, just a mile or so down the road.
Now that rivalry is going to be renewed, with the Bont having gained promotion to Division 1 West by winning the Division 2 West title, losing just one league match all season.
So both clubs can now look forward to some memorable derby days next term.
Pontarddulais secretary Huw Thomas said: “Historically, the rivalry with Hendy is the biggest one, without a doubt.
“It’s about four or five years since we’ve been in the same division, so it will be great to have those derbies back. They will be big occasions. We should be looking at a very decent crowd.”
Reflecting on the club’s title triumph, Thomas said: “The last time we won a league was in 2006. That was in the old Division Four West.
“This will be the highest up the national league pyramid the club has been.
Hopefully we will do well in Division One and give a good account of ourselves. We are looking forward to it. The atmosphere within the club is bouncing at the moment.”
As well as winning Division Two West, the Black and Ambers also reached the final of the Silver Ball, going down to a narrow 16-15 defeat to Morriston at Tata Steel.
“Our target at the start of the season was promotion, so we have surpassed that really,” said Thomas.
“The majority of our first team squad – about 90 per cent of them – have come up through the junior and youth set-up, while we have a coaching team of ex-players, so it’s all from within the club.
“There’s a good rugby environment been created, with really healthy numbers at training. Our second team won the Swansea and District Cup, so there’s another success there.”
Thomas is now in his 23rd year as secretary and has been on the committee for more than three decades.
“I just love the place. It’s a close-knit community and the club is a really important part of that. It’s well used and the success of this season has made it even better.”
